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Keeper

by Campbell Woods

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1.
There’s a yellow house across the street Sometimes at night I watch the people there sleep From my front porch I see them clear And think on the simple joy of having you near And then I finish my smoke and climb the stairs Come in close no one dares It was a series of moments and number of words Some of them blurry most of them slurred Most of them worn with repeated use It was “I love you” and “I’m sorry” as some kind of excuse It was a sad holiday and a quiet drive It was a goodbye letter that never arrived She’s a reaper My lips are sewn She’s a keeper But I can’t keep her for my own She calls me up in the afternoon To tell me the court date’s been set for June I say that I hope that it rains for forty days And it carries the courthouse away on a wave She says “drinking again, well that’s no surprise” Then she hangs up the phone without saying goodbye She’s a reaper My lips are sewn She’s a keeper But I can’t keep her for my own I bet on it going my way in the end Too stubborn to change, too bitter to bend Too bitter to taste, too little to own The mistakes that I’d made or the fits that I’d thrown Or the sad consequence of a wasted ring It’s a little life, it’s a funny thing She’s a reaper My lips are sewn She’s a keeper But I can’t keep her for my own Halifax, NS - 2016
2.
I wake up, I look around, you’re sleeping on the ground You’re sleeping on the ground beside my bed I thought that you were gone, long gone Long gone, long enough to clear your head But you look warm, you look content Just an angry angel heaven kindly sent To my floor, to my bed, to my heart, to my head To my heart Now you feel shortchanged Tell me who doesn’t feel shortchanged? Who’s getting all they give, And giving it just the same? Mama, mama I know This is just you and you told me so You told me this is me and it’s okay, to feel that way ‘Cause it’s a relative thing, Suffering Good story, happy end, pleasant memory, faithful friend Faithful friend, holy wonder Bad luck, bad blood, bad heart, hard love Hard love, rolling thunder But I have been warned, I crossed a line Your eyes are on the door, you’re ready to say goodbye To my floor, to my bed, to my heart, to my head To my heart Now you feel shortchanged Tell me who doesn’t feel shortchanged? Who’s getting all they give, And giving it just the same? Mama, mama I know This is just you and you told me so You told me this is me and it’s okay, to feel that way ‘Cause it’s a relative thing, Suffering Banff, AB - 2018
3.
She folded and unfolded her ticket 20 times Sitting on her suitcase, waiting in line Mom’s out in the parking lot, pretending she’s on the phone Allowing just a couple tears, then driving home Looking out through the dirty glass Through the rain and the cars going past to the Sign that says YOUR AD HERE CALL TOLL-FREE ANYTIME, she whispers on the quiet line I’d hoped for so much more I wanted so much more Hey don’t I deserve a little more On the plane from Coeur d’Alene Tomato juice tasted the same She leafed through the local news Grieved through her leaving blues Local time was 3 AM 3 degrees with a southeast wind A bit of snow still hanging on But nothing like Alberta She got in at an ungodly hour Drank some water, took a shower By the light of the refrigerator She whispered an angry prayer Said it to thin air I’d hoped for so much more I wanted so much more Hey don’t I deserve a little more Monday morning, 8 AM Late for work, late again Used to cause all kinds of stress But lately she’s been caring less Nobody asks and just a couple know Why last week she’d had to go Mostly folks keep to themselves And they don’t ask any questions Banff, AB - 2018
4.
Thank God she said he’s got a weak left hook Lit a cigarette, gave a little look I hope he’s not home when I got there If he’s home I’ll kill him, I’ll kill him I swear I just got this dog last week He’s got so much goddamned energy And I can’t walk him, I gotta go to work I hope the landlord doesn’t find out ‘Cause I’ve lived in three different towns Since January and it’s wearing me down I just gotta find a place I can stay And a man that’ll treat me okay A little yard for the dog to run It’s been hard trying to meet someone I’ve got a little boy but he lives with is dad Things were so good, before they went bad I miss him sometimes, it feels like dying But I don’t somehow I must be born to survive And I wish that I could keep him but it’s better for him there It’s hard for me to give him The right kind of care he needs That’s hard for me ‘Cause I’ve lived in three different towns Since January and it’s wearing me down I just gotta find a place I can stay A place he could come visit someday If his dad says that it’s alright It’s gonna be a hell of a fight I’ve been sitting in this parking lot Just sitting and thinking since seven o’clock I hate the thought of leaving, it’s more than I can bear But I’ve wasted so much time, more than I can spare If my baby doesn’t want me than that’s all I need to know I know just how to pack my things and go I wish that I could stay here, just the way I am I wish that I could settle but I don’t think I can ‘Cuz I’ve lived in three different towns Since January and it’s wearing me down I just gotta find a place I can stay Nashville, Tennessee - 2017
5.
For You 04:06
For you I’d hope, for you I would abandon hope For you I’d try, for you I would let it go For you I’d lie, for you I’d speak the cold hard truth For you For you I’d speak and be heard For you I’d lay down in the dirt For you I would slip away, for only you I’d pull through For you, for you For you I’d stay, for you I would gladly stay For you I’d drop it all and walk away For you I’d stop, and start over new For you, for you, for you For you I’d smile, for you I would refuse to smile For you I’d burn the bridge and walk the aisle For you I’d turn a deeper shade of blue For you For you For You Victoria, B.C. - 2017
6.
There’s a picture of you that I will always keep, I took one morning in Val Marie, Your eyes are shining with the rising sun, I knew as soon as I took it that I’d like that one. There’s a picture of us at Lake Louise, We wanted the water to be brochure green, But the snow was slow to melt last spring, We’re disappointed but we’re still smiling. That was the last time I was sure, That was the last time you were, too. There’s a picture of us in Winnipeg, I’d finished playing to an empty bar, You got up on the stage with me, I hope you get better but you don’t get far. Further and further my mind moves on, To the day we drove straight through Marathon, Rented out a room in cold North Bay, Where we passed two last days of grace. After the last time I was sure, After the last time you were, too. Because summer came and then you went, Back to paying full rent. So all these pictures of you I will keep with me, In case I ever go through Val Marie, I’ll return them to that plain, What I’d give just to hear you complain. Still there’s one picture of you that I will always keep, It’s one I see when I sleep, I’m no more than seventeen, And of you I don’t even dare to dream. Banff, AB - 2018
7.
Effects 02:22
He arranges all his things just so: shine on his boots, boots by the door, a pen, a pencil, a lighter and some picks, a box from Kansas City of wooden match-sticks. He reads the Sunday paper, he hates the Yankees, he tries to read a column, the columnist is cranky. He reads his horoscope; it doesn’t do him any good. Can you imagine if they knew? Just imagine if they could. Baby, baby, baby, why’d you let me down? I’ve been trying to do better, I’ve been trying to get around. He arranges all his things; he calls them his “effects.” He puts some kibble in a bowl, his name on a cheque. He listens to the message saved on the machine I am just stopping quick for cigarettes I’ll see you in fifteen Baby, baby, baby, why’d you leave me last fall? I’ve been trying to do better but today I hit a wall. 7:37 blinking on the microwave. Fly buzzing, caught between a window pane. He’s got a real mosaic going on the table, a collection of his garbage, a collection of a fable. Well, baby, baby, baby, why’d you let me down? I’ve been trying to do better I’ve been trying to get around. He listens to the message saved on the machine I am just stopping quick for cigarettes I’ll see you in fifteen. K, bye. Banff, AB - 2018
8.
Without You 03:09
I’m not the kind to put my foot down. I’m not the kind to make you stay. If you feel like you need to get gone, I won’t be standing in your way. But, I might lie down in the street. Please don’t leave me ‘cause I cannot live without you. I was dead when you found me now I’m feeling pretty good. Please don’t leave me ‘cause I cannot live without you. I haven’t got the answer, no I haven’t got a goddamned clue. Please don’t leave me ‘cause I cannot live without you. You treat me like some kind of stranger. You keep one eye upon the door. If you feel like your good time’s in danger, what can I do but walk the floor? Victoria, B.C. - 2017
9.
Van Gogh 04:59
How’s the baby? Remember to sing to him. It’ll be a week before I can call again. The warden is cracking down on us all and I can’t find myself a dime behind these prison walls. I see him on his way each day. He doesn’t even have money to pay for the rose he brings. The smell of hospital is like home and she won’t get to see him grow. It’s the aggressive kind I’ll take 450 volts to my head and spend the month in bed and forget about my pain I’ll have the number 3 with fries if you please, and occupy my window seat every Friday at 5. She used to love it when I’d take her tray and pretend like we were 17 again, with all these years gone by. You don’t think that life is kind of sad. Me and Van Gogh do but mister it’s just the manic-depressive blues. They’re acting up again. Halifax, NS - 2015
10.
Ticket, Ring 03:43
You thought it’d be me and I thought differently You believed in leaving it alone I believed in shedding light by picking fights and wounds I thought it’d be you You thought it’d be me And I thought it’d be me, too You thought it’d be me, we’d just wait and see You were honest, clear and understood I was indecisive I was sad and I was cruel Still I thought it’d be you And you thought it’d be me And I thought it’d be me, too You thought it’d be me, every time I tried to leave I deserved your patience less and less We played a game that you maintained and swore you would not lose While I thought it’d be you And you thought it’d be me And I thought it’d be me, too You thought it’d be me and it’s funny I don’t think it’s even sinking in If you buy the ticket I will buy the ring Because I want it to be you And you thought it’d be me And I thought it’d be me too I want it to be you And you thought it’d be me And I thought it’d be me, too Toronto, ON - 2017
11.

about

This album was recorded in 2018 at hotel2tango studio in Montreal, QC. Engineered and produced by Howard Bilerman. Additional engineering by Shae Brossard as well as Gavin Gardiner at All Day Coconut studio in Toronto, ON. Mixed by Howard Bilerman. Mastered by Harris Newman at greymarket mastering. Design by Brittany Brooks. Photography by Chesel Alexander.

I acknowledge the support of The Foundation Assisting Canadian Talent on Recordings (FACTOR) on this project.

Special thanks to my parents, Bronwen, Peter, Chris and Carolyn. And in loving memory of my grandparents, Jim, Gwen, Mary and Hubert. And to everybody who has walked with me down the road, thank you.

credits

released April 7, 2020

All songs written by Campbell Woods.
Performed and arranged by Howard Bilerman, Olivier Fairfield, Thor Harris, Shahzad Ismaily, Mike O'Brien, Mary Margaret O'Hara, Kim Richey, Joshua Toal and Campbell Woods.

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Campbell Woods

Campbell Woods pays attention.

He sings soft songs about hard luck. Writing songs rooted in the tradition of Townes Van Zandt, his style is tried and true, but he’s no dinosaur. You’ve heard it all before, but not like this. ... more

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